Sunday, December 03, 2006

Let me tell you the weekend that I had...

Not really a crazy one, but an interesting weekend is what I had.

First, it started on Friday night, because that's when most people's weekend starts.

I went to Peter's co-worker's son's Boy Scout's Spaghetti Dinner. ( Yes, it's a stretch.) The event was at an elementary school cafeteria where all the tables and chairs came up to my knees and the cups were the size of shot glasses. We entered the cafeteria and the distinct smell of children and spaghetti instantly hit our faces.

The place was an absolute ZOO, and it made me not want children, because they were running around hopped up on sugar, and their dirty hands came very close to staining my nice Seven jeans. ( Discount 7 jeans, but nice ones nonetheless.)

We mosied our way through the pasta line and finally sat down to enjoy the overcooked spaghetti, when Peter found some friends of his from work at the next table. They joined us and we were having a nice chat. Peter works in the theatre industry so they were theatre people as well. Suddenly, kids starting gathering around our table, peering over at one of P's friends with great curiosity. Then, they started forming a long line in front of P's lady friend, and I wasn't sure what was happening. It turns out that P's friend, also known as Mary Jo was actually the voice of Mrs. Puff from Spongebob Squarepants, and the kids were fighting to get a glimpse of her. It was hilarious. They all had big round eyes, and asked her to do the voice of the character. Mary Jo was ever so patient and so sweet with the kids, and gave her undivided attention to every single one of them. When I watched the kids politely ask for her autograph (well, most of them) my previous heart of Grinch melted away and I instantly wanted children again. They were SO cute. If I could just bottle that part of childhood up, then I wouldn't mind going through the pain of childbirth. Then again, it's a clear sign that I'm not even close to becoming a parent, because the cute part is as far as I can take when they are in masses like that.

So that was Friday. I had spaghetti, I met a Spongebob character, and I contemplated parenthood.

On Saturday, it was my friend Ben's birthday, so we dared to go out in Old Town for dinner. The area was PACKED with USC and UCLA fans, (mostly SC), and I arrived right after UCLA won, so it was chaotic. I was walking through an alley of different bars, and I noticed 2 grown men with USC attire having a heart-to-heart talk. They were unusually close and were lowering their voices, so it seemed serious. When I passed by them, this is EXACTLY what I heard:

Man #1: "Man, you, you have to realize... You're more than USC. You're a human being. You're so much more than that."
Man #2: "But dude, man, I am going to DIE if we lose tonight. I'm serious. I'm going to die."

Give me a fucking break! Moments after hearing USC's loss, an ambulance with sirens blazing came running through the street, so I imagine that the man actually did die.

Anyhoo, good dinner, good company, and a great night of clubbing followed. One thing that dampened the night was when a 14-year-old boy yelled "SCROTUM!!" in my ear as I was about to cross the street. Even after telling him to fuck off, I was annoyed and wished I had kicked the little bitch down. No matter how old these male species are, their immaturity and ridiculousness never fails to amaze me.

So, that was my weekend. How was yours?

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